


My Brother's Keeper

by DeathsLastPrayer



Series: A Series of Unrelated Events Starring Jean x Eren [3]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: AU, Fluff and Angst, I don't even know how to explain this one..., Jean and Eren as brothers, M/M, Slight OOC on account of the circumstances, brothercest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-22
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2018-03-19 03:26:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3594582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeathsLastPrayer/pseuds/DeathsLastPrayer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which: Jean and Eren are brothers and a warped relationship forms between them. Or, the one where Jean's hate and love for Eren are so distorted, he can't think straight.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Brother's Keeper

#####  I. 

Eren Jaeger is birthed unto the world to a mother who loves him with every fiber of her being. Shortly after she tells her newborn –her first and only child- that she loves him and he’s beautiful and will grow to be an incredible man, she dies. Blood loss, according to his father, Dr. Grisha Jaeger. 

But Eren never gets to know any of that –never gets to know his biological father. 

See, Grisha can’t bear to look at the child who “killed” his wife. Knows that he can’t raise him and he can’t love him. So he gives Eren to a couple that he met at the fertility clinic months ago. A couple that has attempted to conceive for years: the Kirsteins. They’re good people –wealthy and hard working and honest and bright and young. Grisha thinks they’re good enough to have the last piece of his wife –the piece that he can’t bear to take lest he ruins it. So he gives Eren to them and they take one look at the one-week old child with incredible sea colored corneas and they fall in love. 

A parents honest-to-god love at first sight. 

They take the child home and keep his first name but give him their last name because he is their child. Theirs. Nothing will ever change that –not now and certainly not later. 

Not even when, two months later, the impossible happens and they find out that they’re three months with child. 

So the Kirsteins vow that, even though they’re being blessed with another child (a son who they intend to name Jean), they won’t treat Eren any less. They’ll do everything in their power to make him feel like he belongs, like he’s theirs and as special as the one they’re creating. 

Hopefully, Eren won’t and will never know that he isn’t their child through blood ties but he is their child all the same. 

As it stands, blood doesn’t mean family –just as family doesn’t mean blood. 

That’s all there is to it. 

* * *

* * *

“Mom…” Eren’s a child of few words. He tends to speak with his eyes and in robust verbs that belay the inner workings of his mind and he’s so very intelligent that it’s amazing –makes his parents proud. 

And he’s only three. 

Just three and he absorbs everything like a sponge. Just three and he has the concept of “practice makes perfect” down to a science because he practices and does make things perfect. Just three and he has a preference for showing as opposed to vocalizing. 

So, Eren is a child of few words but, when he does speak- 

“Yes, dear?” 

“Jean needs diaper.” –it’s always about his little brother. 

Always about Jean because, by age three, Eren already knows that he will do anything for his little brother. Anything he asks or needs or wants –Eren will make sure that Jean has, doesn’t need to ask, and never has to want. 

Never. 

* * *

* * *

Eren doesn’t want to fight with Jean. He really doesn’t. But he’s learned that he has a quick temper and a fiery personality that sparks to life when people push all of the wrong (or all of the right) buttons. It’s something that’s just in him –apart of him and ingrained. Like his gut instinct. 

So, yeah. He doesn’t like fighting with Jean about anything but, lately, it seems like they fight about everything. 

He wants to blame puberty because he just turned 13 and Jean is due to turn 13 later in the year and they’re hormonal and charged up and- and Eren wants to blame puberty. 

But his gut instinct says otherwise. 

See, Eren’s never pegged himself as the most socially aware person and he’s not much of a talker, however, he knows Jean. Jean is his little brother and Eren likes to think that he knows everything about the brat. Likes to think he’s a walking “Jean Encyclopedia” because he’s helped to raise Jean and teach him and- and all of that jazz. Even when Jean pulls away and is defiant or they’re fighting and arguing, Eren knows him best. Knows what to say to make Jean the most upset or subdued. Knows how to cheer him up or bring him down. 

Sad thing is, Jean seems to know him just the same. 

So Eren doesn’t get why all of their interactions dissolve into fights where fist are flying and names are being called and blood is drawn. Doesn’t understand or get where all of the animosity is coming from when he can’t recall it being there before. At least, not to the point where it’s at now –where every encounter is like walking on broken glass and just waiting for a shard to rip the flesh and bleed out. 

Again, he wants to blame puberty and testosterone. 

But his gut continues to disagree. 

Which causes Eren to spend his nights wracking his brain and trying to figure out what went wrong –when/where/how/why? 

He remembers being close to Jean. Remembers a time when they were inseparable and, though they argued and had disagreements, it was never anything too serious. There weren’t any trigger words or landmines that he had to look out for back then. 

On the other hand, that relationship is one from before: before they started school. 

After… After is right around the time everything really starts to change. When they’re separated and slotted into different classes. When they make different friends but Jean is (as always) Eren’s number one. Apparently, he isn’t Jean’s but he’s never let that bother him. 

Nothing’s really that fucked up until they start of junior high, which, by this point, they’re leading separate lives. Lives outside of each other while still being intertwined. 

Almost like strangers who float in and out of the same circle of friends. 

See, Jean plays soccer and smokes behind the bleachers and gets his ears pierced and starts staying out late and starts hanging out with people that Eren knows (because people make it a habit to know him, which he doesn’t understand) but he doesn’t like for his little brother. 

Sure, Eren likes Bert and Reiner and Annie because they’ve been in school with him since the beginning but those guys… they’re bad news. At least for Jean. Jean only has one decent friend (one that Eren approves of anyway): Marco. Marco who’s straight-laced and on friendly terms with everyone because he’s always all smiles and he’s always gotten along well with Jean (who really isn’t the most personable person because he’s an angsty, pessimistic, and pragmatic little shit). It probably helps that they’re on the soccer team together. So Eren approves of Marco. Okay, and maybe Sasha and Connie too but not as much as Marco. But Eren doesn’t think Annie, Bert, and Reiner are good enough for his brother and, again, he likes them well enough –he just doesn’t like the shady shit that they get up to or how that rubs off on Jean. 

Not that Eren considers himself a saint. 

Or anything at all like Jean, for that matter. 

He doesn’t do sports –not like that. He likes boxing because he’s, regretfully, kind of small and he needs to know how to hold his own out in the world and- fine. His dad put him onto it because he’s always had a lot of energy that needs to be expended someway and somehow. But Eren likes to read more than anything else. It’s how he meets Armin when he’s about six but not how he meets Mikasa. (He meets her at the gym he boxes at when some guys think they can pick on the only chick there. He’s a self-righteous eight year old and all for the underdogs so he goes to her rescue and tells her that she can do anything even if she is a “she” and they become fast friends after that. They spar together and she’s kind of a prodigy when it comes to everything so she picks it up quick –she’s better than him. But he makes good friends out of Armin and Mikasa who end up at his junior high. ) Whatever the case, he spends his time with his head in the books or getting smacked around in the ring or- 

But- But not a saint… 

Yeah. 

See, Eren’s aware of his body by junior high (hormones and the like) and he’s aware of what he wants and –okay. Reiner is a horrible influence and Eren knows this personally because he’s hung out with him too –they box together at the same place sometimes- and he’s been to Reiner’s place and he’s been around when Reiner’s pillaged through his dad’s hidden porn stash. Eren’s watched porn and read skin mags and looked shit up online and- And he’s done those things. 

And then he’s done… other things –things that involve touching and kissing and being adult-like. And Eren likes it but he’s pretty sure that he’s not supposed to be doing that type of thing with Reiner. So he tells Mikasa and they try it too and Eren sees no difference between the pleasure of it all –he likes a hard chest just about as much as he likes a big luscious one so he figures girls and guys are both okay. When Armin gets curious and reminds Eren that he reads and researches everything- well- Eren tests those waters and it’s a bit different but definitely not bad. 

Eren concludes that it’s not all that wrong. Not with Reiner or Mikasa or Armin. But he’s not dumb either and he figures they’re too young but they’ve already got the ball rolling and it’s just some harmless “fooling around”. 

So he’s got his own things going and his own bad habits but he’s the older brother and he has to protect Jean (because he wants to think that Jean is still a saint –someway, somehow) but Jean makes it so hard. 

Makes him swear and fight and bruise and leave bruises. 

Plus, Jean knows how to push all of the right buttons –the ones that make his smile drop and his blood boil furiously… 

And Eren always regrets it. Regrets when they fight. Regrets when they go without speaking for days or weeks. Regrets watching Jean grow further away from him because he feels like there’s nothing he can do about that. Nothing he can do to bring back the little brother that used to smile and cling and talk to him. The little brother he used to speak for because he thought Jean’s voice was never heard. 

It’s still not heard –not really. 

Maybe that’s why Jean’s turned into a shitty little asshole. If that’s it then Eren knows that it’s not his fault and it might be puberty and a combination of growing and being rebellious with age. 

Or it could be his gut feeling. 

Eren hopes it’s not. 

But he’s sure his gut isn’t wrong. 

#####  II. 

Jean is birthed unto the world to two parents who are ecstatic and elated because they are told that the likeliness of them conceiving a child is 1 in 100,000 and they are sure that they can’t beat those odds. But they do –miraculously. So Jean enters the world and he has a brother who’s nine months older and the Kirsteins are excited because they now have two darling sons and life is incredible. 

When Jean is born with big bright blue eyes and a piercing wail, Mrs. Kirstein thinks he looks just like his father but has her eyes. Mr. Kirstein thinks that he’ll grow up strong and handsome and he’ll perfectly continue the Kirstein name. 

And then they remember Eren and their promise to themselves and they bring him into the room and think that he’s a perfect fit too and that they must always keep that in mind and always keep him in the loop because they love him. Love him as if they crafted him in the womb the same as Jean. 

When Eren sees Jean, he says, “Mine!” And smiles and half holds the baby as they sit in his mother’s lap. 

* * *

* * *

Jean comes into the world happy and loved and cared for. 

But… but. 

There is a but on account that the Kirsteins still worry about making sure that Eren is never forgotten and never left out and never feels lesser (and these are big and overwhelming concerns that plague them daily). So they make sure they tell him often that they love him and they make sure that they give Eren twice as much attention –just in case they unconsciously aren’t giving him any. But- but this leads to slightly neglecting Jean and it’s not on purpose. There are no bad intentions involved. It’s simply that they know that Jean is their child –has their blood. And they assume that he knows and will know and will remember that –will remember that he’s loved and cared for and precious. 

But Jean is a child two years into life. 

A child who doesn’t understand why his mommy dotes on Eren but barely bats an eye for him. A child who can’t seem to make his daddy care about playing chase but the man always goes out to rough house with Eren. A child who is loved and doted on by the brother he already loves and hates (yet, doesn’t know those emotions well enough to say them or act them out) but appreciates because Eren loves him enough for the both of their parents. 

Their parents are hyperaware of Eren and everything that Eren does. 

Eren is hyperaware and hyper-attentive in general and he focuses that energy on Jean. Makes sure that Jean knows that he’s loved too –in his own way. 

* * *

* * *

Jean is five when his parents start using the phrase that he hates more than anything else in the world: “Why can’t you be more like your brother?” 

That phrase makes his skin crawl and his hair stand on end and his stomach knot or churn or both because- because he’s not and will never be like his brother –like Eren. 

Jean’s only five and he already knows this. Knows that they’re different in a lot of ways –even though they’re only nine months apart and in the same grade. Eren’s smart and pretty and he doesn’t talk much but, when he does, everyone listens. Eren’s well-mannered and a good-boy and the maids give him candies before they go to bed at night and they tuck him in. Eren is mommy’s perfect, perfect angel –even when he’s not perfect. And Eren is daddy’s golden boy –even when he flubs and flounders. 

Eren gets everything, everyone, and all of the attention. 

Jean doesn’t. 

And, at age five, Jean doesn’t understand. He doesn’t know the true weight of that realization or the dark emotions brewing in his gut. 

What he does know is that, no matter how the rest of the world treats him, Eren is always there, right beside him. 

Even though Jean kind of hates Eren for always, always, getting everything and anything and everyone, he loves Eren too because Eren sticks up for him. Eren’s always on his side and Eren’s always holding his hand and cheering him up when he cries and tucking him in at night and waking him up in the morning and making sure he’s fed and dressed and- And Eren is there. 

Eren tells him that he can be and do anything and it’s okay if they’re different. Eren teaches him what he doesn’t know and pushes him to get better. Eren tells Jean that he loves him – tells Jean that he’s “the best little brother ever”. Eren doesn’t compare him to anyone or anything. Eren doesn’t personally hurt his feelings –it’s just something that happens in a around about way through their environment. 

Eren tells him that he loves him –loves him no matter what. And Eren always makes sure to hug and/or kiss him when their parents forget to. 

At age five, Jean thinks that, the only person he really has is Eren. 

* * *

* * *

“Dad didn’t make it to my soccer game… again.” Not that he expects him to because Jean’s used to never seeing his dad there. But Eren’s always there. Eren always shows up. Like his good luck charm. “And where’s mom?” 

Eren snags Jean’s bag and it’s about as big as him so he struggles a bit. “A meeting. She left after third quarter but she said you were great. Dad’s still outta town so… you know. Petra’s waiting for us by the bleachers though.” 

Again. Again he ends up with no parents on the field. Just Eren and the nanny and- “It’s not fair. They always miss my games but they always show up for you.” Always. 

“Nuh-uh! I don’t have things for them to show up to.” 

“What about your karate thing?” 

“Dad only came because he didn’t believe me when I told him that I was gonna be a junior black belt.” 

“The book fair?” 

“Mom says that you can never have too many books.” 

“Your ninth birthday!” Jean shouts incredulously because- seriously? Eren has an answer for everything. 

Eren frowns. “It was my birthday and that’s all I wanted was you guys there.” 

“Dad wasn’t there for my birthday. He didn’t even call me until the next day!” Jean remembers. He remembers waiting and whining and his mom getting annoyed because he wouldn’t stop asking when his dad was coming home or calling or- yeah. Jean remembers. 

It still kinda hurts his feelings, even though his dad apologized and gave him that 3DS to make up for it. 

“But that’s because he was-” 

“Away for business. I know. He’s always _away_ but he still comes home for you!” 

Eren doesn’t think that’s true but- well- “I’m sorry.” Because he is. 

He’s sorry that Jean feels like that. He’s sorry that those big honey colored eyes are shiny and dewy like Jean’s about to cry –knows that he’s probably going to if they keep on talking about their dad. Eren’s sorry because he doesn’t understand what Jean’s getting at but he wants to make it better and he’s not doing a good job. But he will. He’ll make Jean happy. He’ll make Jean forget that their parents aren’t there at the moment. 

“S’not your fault.” Jean grumbles and tugs the other side of the bag. 

Eren knows that it’s not his fault but- well- Jean looks at him like it is his fault sometimes and that confuses him. “Hey, when we get home, I’ll ask Petra to order a pizza and then we can make a fort in my room and we can camp, yeah?” 

Pizza and camping and fort building- “Can we get those cakes too!” 

“Yeah.” 

“Sweet!” Jean likes building forts and he likes being in Eren’s room. Eren’s room feels like home. “Can we sleep in the fort?” 

“Duh!” Eren laughs when Jean pushes the bag in his direction and he shoves it back. “We’ll get soda too! And we can watch scary movies.” 

“I hate scary movies…” 

“But it’ll be fun and I’ll keep you safe!” He always does. 

Jean nods because he trusts Eren and Eren never lies –has never once lied to him. “Fine but, you gotta sleep in the sleeping bag with me.” 

“Course! Where else would I sleep.” 

That puts a smile on Jean’s face. Eren- even though he’s everyone’s perfect everything, he’s always just Eren to Jean. The best big brother ever. 

* * *

* * *

He hates himself just about as much as he hates his brother but it’s complicated. 

Jean knows that much. 

He’s thirteen and he can tell that the root of all of his problems is his beloved big brother who gets everything and everyone and never has to want or try for anything. The perfect, prodigal, child. The perfect brother, student, friend… Jean fucking hates Eren. 

Which doesn’t explain the dreams that he has at night –the ones where his name falls from his brother’s perfect pink lips in this way that just pools his blood south. Makes him wake up with soiled boxers and sheets and heart racing and mind reeling. The dreams that show him doing things to Eren that he’s watched guys do to a girl in pornos. And- okay. He’s watched a few guy-on-guy and girl-on-girl things with Reiner but he still doesn’t think it’s possible. But it gets him off the same as anything else and he wants to blame puberty. 

But puberty doesn’t explain why he gets off to dreams about his brother. 

Dreams about doing all sorts of things to Eren and Eren loving every minute of it and- and Jean knows it’s so fucking wrong. Fucking sick because Eren’s his big brother. 

What the hell is that? 

He loves and hates his big brother to the point that it’s actually driven him crazy and now he wants to defile the bastard and- 

And it pisses him off every day. Makes him hate himself and Eren more. Every. Day. 

Every day… those feelings intensify and mix and meld and blend and make Jean feel amped up and charged and makes every word or gesture from Eren feel like a deliberate stab. One that gets him going and makes him emote all over the place. But anger is the easiest thing to latch onto and grasp so Jean always goes with that. Always. It’s way easier to lash out with his quick slick tongue, which always leads to a physical fight but it’s okay because Jean likes touching Eren –even when they’re fighting because he avoids him more than he doesn’t these days and- 

And Jean is going mad and he can’t talk to anyone about anything but he’s really starting not to give a flying fuck. 

He hates Eren for being everything that he is –for encompassing everything that he does. 

But he loves Eren more than he knows what to do with because Eren –his big brother has never abandoned him. Has and does love and care for him no matter the circumstances. 

Jean knows this. 

It doesn’t change the fact that he’s disgusted with himself and his conflicting torrent of emotions. 

It doesn’t change the fact that he hates Eren as much as he loves him. 

Life fucking sucks. 

* * *

* * *

“You fucking… Jean…” Eren’s voice is harsh and raspy and he’s trying to be quiet. So very, very, quiet because their parents- 

Jean laughs- laughs and keeps Eren arched with his palms flat against the door and keeps holding those trim hips and keeps grinding but takes a second to mouth at Eren’s nape (it’s his brother’s weak spot –he knows this well). “Quiet or they’ll hear you.” 

It’s New Year’s and Jean highly doubts that anyone, let alone their parents, will hear them fucking in the West Wing bathroom but. But. Anything could happen and Jean likes the way Eren flushes as his pulse thuds wildly at the mere mention of being caught. He thinks that, maybe, it turns Eren on a bit more than he’s willing to admit but that’s fine. Jean doesn’t need him to say anything –has never needed Eren to say anything in order to understand him. Understand that Eren will do anything for him. 

Even this. 

“Fucking asshole…” Eren groans, the sound low and deep and then pitchy when Jean cants his hips and thrusts and snakes a hand around to Eren’s cock to stroke him just the way he likes. 

“Your fault,” Jean murmurs against Eren’s ear because it is. 

Everything is and always has been Eren’s fault –for the last 16 years. Their whole lives. 

From their parents’ blatant favoritism to his own warped affections and desires. That’s all on Eren. 

Although, the sex is new… new-ish. 

Since the summer and after a particularly vicious fight in which Eren had him pinned to the ground and Jean couldn’t think beyond his anger and those blue-green eyes and the slow swelling of Eren’s bruised bottom lip as he panted and cursed and the adrenaline that made his ears pound and his dick throb. And then he had his hand tangled in Eren’s hair and had their lips connected in a rough, unrelenting kiss –or rather, a clashing of teeth and tongue and blood. Jean vaguely remembers Eren going slack with shock, which gave him just enough time to swap their positions and prepare to get the fuck away because- because he’s been dreaming about violating Eren since forever. Tainting the perfect image in a way that only he would bear witness to… 

And then it became a reality. Something oh-so tangible because Jean had forgotten one crucial thing about his big brother: no matter how hard they fight or argue or drift apart, Eren has never refused him of anything. That day, Eren gave over himself and continues still to give Jean everything that he wants. 

All of himself, down to eternal damnation if so it shall be. 

Jean’s glad because he can’t get enough of loving and hating and thinking about Eren. He can’t. 

And he doubts that he ever will. 

“Jeannnn… hurry the fuck up…” Eren whines and pushes back and pulls Jean’s cock deeper. It makes him mewl and clutch at the rack on the door. 

Jean groans and leans back a bit to watch. Watch as his big brother impales himself –watches as that tan back trembles and those tantalizing hips quake. He doesn’t want to rush but- but they’ve been gone for a bit so- so he starts thrusting with insane abandon and draws out those delicious sounds –sounds that he really wants to suck right off of Eren’s tongue but can’t because of their position. He jerks lazily at Eren’s cock and focuses more on making his big brother cum from being penetrated alone and Jean’s sure that he can. 

He knows Eren’s body so well after all. 

“Ah- Just- There!” And Eren’s over the edge. He brings Jean with him. 

And Jean can’t get enough of that sopping warmth and the way those muscles are clamped down around him like a vice. Can’t get enough of Eren or knowing that he just nutted inside of his brother –marked his most precious and despised person in a way that no one else has or ever will. “All mine,” he bites the words out before biting down on Eren’s shoulder to mark sensitive, sweat slicked flesh. 

Eren is his and his alone. 

Jean knows that that will never change –no matter what he puts Eren through. 

#####  III. 

Going to a college on the other side of the country fixes nothing. 

Nothing at all. 

It, in no way, alters or shifts or disfigures their relationship. 

Eren purposely chooses to leave because he knows that he’s tainted Jean and that- whatever they’ve got going or have had going for the last three years- it’s not healthy. Maybe they’ve never had a “healthy”, brotherly relationship. Which is exactly why Eren chooses to leave and he doesn’t tell Jean where he chose to go for college and he tells his parents the bare minimum so that they can’t let it slip to Jean. And he waits until Jean’s out one night before he packs up all of his shit and has the movers load it up and he leaves because he gets accepted early and has classes that entire summer (which only his dad knows about really). So he escapes and he only bids Mikasa and Armin farewell but they’ll be there by the start of fall semester, which means it’s not forever. 

But he leaves. 

Eren leaves because he can’t refuse Jean of anything –even when he needs to. 

He entirely belongs to his little brother. 

It drives him crazy and keeps him up and makes him feel guilty and makes him disgusted with himself and- and Eren needs to escape because, no matter what, it’s all his fault. Everything. So he needs to save Jean from him. Needs to leave. 

But, see, even when he does, it changes nothing. 

And that is exactly why Jean is standing in the entryway of his dorm with an impish smile tugging at his pierced lip and a duffle and- “What the fuck are you doing here?” Eren’s tugging him onto the elevator and- 

As soon as the doors shut, Jean’s pushing the emergency button –making the car stall and boxing Eren in the corner. “I should be asking you the same question? You didn’t even tell me that you were leaving and it took me three weeks to find you. Three. Made me ask dad…” The words are whispered against Eren’s lips with Jean’s tongue teasing at the flat press of plush pink. Teasingly. 

Eren hates that he shudders and hates himself more for canting his hips when Jean wedges a knee right between his thighs- “I’m not good for you. This,” Eren waves his hands between them and lets them get pinned above his head before he growls out- “This isn’t normal. Brothers don’t- I’ve ruined you.” 

Those words bring him back a handful of years –reminds him of that gut feeling that he ignored and shouldn’t have. Those words taste sour and coat his tongue like spoiled milk –makes him nauseous. 

Jean leans back. Leaves just enough space between them to give Eren the illusion that he has his own personal bubble. “That’s what you keep saying. But you’re not the one who started this so, if anything, I’m the one corrupting you.” He’s the one who makes the first move and he’s the one playing at Eren’s weaknesses for him, not the other way around. 

But Eren’s the oldest and he’ll never let Jean take the fall for anything –especially not something like- like… like whatever the fuck it is they’ve been doing for the last couple of years. Which he says and adds on, “This isn’t healthy.” 

Nothing about brothers having sex and making proclamations of everlasting love to one another is healthy in any society. It’s actually ridiculously taboo –Eren knows. He knows all of those facts and knows that, if they were ever to be found out- 

God… he doesn’t even want to think about what will happen when and/or if they get caught- 

“I don’t care.” Jean smiles a bit when those beautiful blue-green eyes snap up to stare at him. “I don’t care about what’s healthy or moral or virtuous. Just you. All I care about is you. All that have is you.” Because Eren’s always been there –no matter what they were going through or when. 

Eren’s the only one who’s ever really saw him. 

And Eren doesn’t know what to say to that because his mind is shutting down and going on autopilot –the commands etched into his very soul that tell him to bend and mold to Jean’s every whim. The innate command that demands he make his little brother happy because he loves Jean so much- would do anything for him. Even damn himself. “Turn the elevator on. We’ll go to my room.” 

The smile that touches Jean’s handsome face and the searing kiss that follows makes Eren’s head spin. They make him feel relaxed and content and- and so very, very guilty. But Jean’s happy. Jean’s happy and that’s all that Eren ever really strives for is Jean’s happiness so- 

So he’s fucked and there’s nothing he can do about it and he’s starting to believe that he never really intended to do anything about it. That’s probably why he moved halfway across the country and why he has a single room and why he and Jean will probably spend the whole of their summer submersed in each other. Alone. Because, deep down, Eren knows that he does and will forever belong to Jean. 

It’s been that way since the day Jean was born. 

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what to say about this one... It's meant to be dark-ish and snippets that reveal the whole so I'm sorry if things seem like they're missing but- well- it's that kind of one-shot. The reader is supposed to feel a little lost and unknowing because that's how Jean and Eren feel with regard to their whole brother/lover situation. Sorry if that was or is confusing! Also, I apologize for any out of character aspects of this story!
> 
> Nevertheless, I hope you all enjoyed!
> 
> And, if you dug it, drop me a line!


End file.
